July 31, 2020

World Records Week Morning Jokes (7-31-2020)

by Chompers

We've got some silly jokes on today's Chompers. So get ready to break some laughing records!

Transcript

[THEME SONG BEGINS]


>> RACHEL: Good morning, it’s time for Chompers, your twice daily toothbrushing show. 


It’s World Records Week, and today we’ve got some jokes to set the world record for the most laughter while brushing teeth!


Start brushing on the top of your mouth. Pick a side, and brush in little circles all the way around each tooth.


>>KIDS: 3, 2, 1 brush!


[THEME SONG ENDS]


>> RACHEL: Here’s your first joke: 


Why couldn’t the world’s fastest man listen to music?


>>KIDS: WHY?


>> RACHEL: Because he BROKE the record!


[RIMSHOT/CRASH]


>> RACHEL: A record is a disk with music on it that you can play on a record player! But a record can break easily. People used to listen to records much more, before we played our music on our phones or computers.


Switch your brushing to the other side of the top of your mouth…


[SWITCH BELL]


>> RACHEL:  and brush the molars in the back too.


What was the joke about again? 


>>ZAC: The fastest man couldn’t listen to music ‘cause he had only one broken record.


>> RACHEL: Oh, yeah. That’s actually funny, ‘cause we say someone breaks a record when they do better than the person who was the best at it before! So if you’re the fastest woman to run 1 mile and then one day, someone else runs 1 mile faster than you, they can say they broke your record. You can also break your own record - by running again and going faster than you did before!


Switch to the bottom of your mouth…


[SWITCH BELL]


>> RACHEL: -and brush the inside, outside, and chewing side of each tooth.


Ok so now that you get it, this joke should be a breeze:


Why wasn’t the world’s fastest woman allowed in music stores?


>>KIDS: WHY?


>> RACHEL: She was always breaking records!


[RIMSHOT/BREAKING SOUND]


>> RACHEL: Get it?


>>KID: Yes! 


[LAUGH]


>> RACHEL: Switch to the other side of the bottom of your mouth…


[SWITCH BELL]


>> RACHEL: -but don’t brush too hard.


Here’s one last joke before you go: 


Knock knock...


>>KIDS: Who’s there?

 

>> RACHEL: World’s most annoying tune.

 

>>KIDS: World’s most annoying tune who?

 

[KID SINGS STRANGE SONG]

 

>> RACHEL: So what do you think does that sound like the world’s most annoying tune?

 

>>GROUP: Yes!


[LAUGH]

[THEME SONG BEGINS]


>> RACHEL: That’s it for Chompers today, but come back tonight to BREAK the world record for the most laughter while brushing teeth! Until then…


>>KIDS: 3, 2, 1 spit!


[THEME SONG ENDS]