April 16, 2021

Standup Week Friday Morning (4-16-2021)

by Chompers

Background show artwork for Chompers

Get ready to laugh on today’s Chompers! Because our comedians Rachel Dry and Hannah Solow are on the show!

Where to Listen

Transcript

>> Rachel: Hey you're back! 


It's time for Chompers, your morning and night toothbrushing show. Start brushing on the top of your mouth on one side, and brush all the way to the molars in the back. 


>> Rachel: 3, 2, 1 brush!


>> Rachel: It’s Stand Up week. So please give a big round of applause for our comedian Rachel Dry. (APPLAUD) 

  

>> Rachel D: So my name is Rachel as you just heard and we just meet each other so I want to tell you a few things about me. My favorite color is purple 


my favorite number is purple.


my favorite book is Purple.


and my favorite animal is (PAUSE) a three toed sloth.


>> Rachel: Switch your brushing to the other side of the top of your mouth, and brush all the way around each tooth.


[Switch Bell]


>> RACHEL D: So let me tell you about when the tooth fairy break in to my house for the first time. When I lost my very first tooth. She brought me a my little pony. I was really excited. I felt really lucky. and the second time when I lost my second tooth I woke up in the morning there was just a real horse in my bedroom eating a carrot. The third time when I lost my third tooth I woke up in the morning (pause) and there was just a giant pile of horse poop.


>> Rachel: Alright, thanks Rachel, that was gross. Now switch to the bottom of your mouth and give your front teeth a brush too while we switch comedians


Next up we’ve got Hannah Solow. And Hannah THINKS she knows a lot about what kind of pets kids have at home…  Put your hands together for Hannah! 


>> Hannah: Hi everyone. I heard some stuff about you guys. I heard that you have some pets and I heard that you have a giraffe that you keep in your bathroom. Is that true?


>> KIDS: NO.


>> Hannah: But I did hear that you have a pet dinosaur that lives under your bed. 

Is that true? 


>> KIDS: NO! 


>> Hannah: Well you should check because I heard you have a pet dinosaur. 


>> Rachel: Alright but first Switch your brushing to the other side of the bottom of your mouth and brush your front teeth too.


[Switch Bell]


>> Hannah: And I heard that you have a mouse that sleeps in your bed with you. Is that true? 


>> KIDS: NO! 


>> Hannah: Is it true, wait, I heard that you had a bunch of snakes that live in your closet. You don't? Are you sure? I want to tell you guys I do have some pets in my house. I do. I have 52 hamsters. 


>> KIDS: NO! 


>> HANNAH: I do. I swear. I'm sure. I'm going to tell you all their names. OK. These are their names. Mario Mario Luigi pancake broccoli stinky sock stinky sock Jr. Zuzu, cool. 


>> RACHEL: (cutting off) Hannah, we don’t have time for 52 NAMES. You’ll have to come back tonight! Until then,


 >> KIDS: 3, 2, 1 spit!